JOURNEY TOGETHER
The pictures are cute. The memes are hilarious. The struggle is real.
“Homeschool is a way of life,” described my 15yo, who has homeschooled her entire life (except for a brief 6 weeks in kindergarten). It’s viewing education not as a separate chore but as a way of living. We learn in any space at any time, not only in a brick & mortar building or during specific hours.
Those of you “schooling at home” due to Covid-19 didn’t make this choice. It was thrust upon you, without tools or preparation. Out of benevolence & burden, schools are working feverishly to adapt to distance/remote learning. They have many masters: state & federal requirements, parents, and of course students. They have many decisions: online or packets? if online, synchronous or asynchronous? lecture-based or flipped classroom? short meeting check-ins or full day of activity? More than ever, the Parent-Teacher-Student trifecta will rely on the parents. Parents – whether you are an essential worker (with all the stress that entails), working from home, not working due to work furlough or loss, or are a SAHP – this is a new role with significant responsibilities.
Keep in mind that your responsibility is to your child. Not to the teacher or school. From there, you can make choices that make sense for your situation.
A brave few will dive headfirst into these new waters. Most will need to sit with the idea a bit, observe others, research lists & fora. When we first seriously considered homeschooling our daughters, I did quite a bit of hand wringing myself until finally, my husband encouraged me to just do it, saying, “You can’t can’t screw ’em up too bad.”
What he acknowledged with that statement was that our children were individuals already. A child is not a program you code or a vessel to fill. We do our best as parents to instill the things we think are important –– from morality to life skills to education –– but at best, we leave an imprint on their souls. Some shape, a bit of color. Provide as much love, support, and opportunity as you can, and your child will blossom into the best adult they choose to be.
Give yourself a break during this challenging time. Step back a moment and see which path looks best for your circumstance. Imagine hiking off-trail. You wouldn’t run. You’d consider how best to get from here to there. Then you’d take it step by step, noting the weather & landscape, accepting detours for safety or inaccessibility. You’d also take breaks as needed – to regroup or simply enjoy the view. Nevertheless, step by step, you’d make your way together.
This is the key: the journey must be together. This does not mean the tail wags the dog. You are in charge. But I bet your kiddo has some sense of what interests her/him and may already be showing energy preferences & temperament inclinations. The key is to extend those interests and harness that enthusiasm as a partnership. Pay attention and structure activities specific to your child’s energy & temperament. Look at these new schooling at home challenges as opportunities for you both to learn. For parents, especially, this is an opportunity to model problem-solving behavior.
What am I really saying? Stop trying to mimic the school day at home. Ditch the packets or online classes if you can – de-prioritize if you can’t avoid them. If your kid has a passion, let your child go down the rabbit hole. Let there be messes … and then teach them to clean it up. Learn to code, to play chess, to draw dogs, to speak a new language! Build a block city & let it stay up for cross-play with other toys. Do science projects that ooze and blow up. Encourage performance & visual art. Repurpose ordinary objects. Create a ninja circuit outside & run it together.
Learn, create, & live together.
vidamixta 